Another day at the Home for the Aged

It has been awhile since I have written anything about my work so I thought it is about time I changed all that.

Where to start?

I have done some more TRAINING { thats all this place wants you to do, but if they are paying for it, hey} I am now a Senior Carer, which even came with a pay rise of 50 cents an hour. How cool is that!!!!! But we are not allowed to tell the other pca's that, cause they will all want to become senior carers, but work only needs two at each workplace.

Let me refresh your memories about my inmates, sorry I mean my ressies. Some new and some old.

psycho chicken, still ranting and raving, still with us

Mr and Mrs Bretheren, [sometimes I think if Mr Bretheren goes to Heaven I don't want to go there} still with us

Mr 58 year old simple sex fiend, still with us

Mrs 88 yr old, having sex with younger man, Lady. still with us

Mrs I dont believe in gossiping, Died

Mrs Whinger, sent to care centre, YIPPEE

Mr and Mrs number 3 haircuts, new

Mr never understands a word your saying, new

Goerge, sent care centre, passed away

Mr Bill, sent to care centre

Mr Bill's girfriend, went to Bowder secure area

Mr Bi-polar, new

Mr and Mrs Oh I can talk underwater, new

Mrs Z, new

Ray { thank you Jocie} still with us

Mrs I should be on oxygen, new

I think that will do for now, let me fill you in on some of the real newies

Mr and Mrs Oh I can talk underwater, have been with us for 2 months now. He is a lovely old man who has to put up with a talkalot wife. She grabs your arm and pulls you down to her level and in a droning voice will tell you, I was the first office girl for Nambour hospital and what I dont know about medication is not worth knowing. I could have been a doctor you know. Man, she is just about giving you mouth to mouth, she is that close to your face. Thank goodness she doesn't eat garlic. You cannot get it through her little head that medications have changed in about 60years. She is such a joy for her doctor, not.
Mr and Mrs number 3 haircuts, have been with us for about 5 months. They have matching haircuts and when I gave them their medication the other day, guess what, they wear matching surf thongs. How cute. For the first 2 months they were with us, I didnt think Mrs no 3 haircut had a voice. Her husband did all the talking for her. Now she says hello when I talk to her.
You know Mr Bi-polar, he is creepy. He is starting to call all us girls Honey. yuck. Each day he takes a liking to one of the nurses and thats the only nurse he will talk to when he comes to the nurses stations and he can come to the nurses station about 30 times in one shift. He knows too much about his meds and tries to stop taking them. He only does this for a few days and then we give him the option of taking them or going to hospital mental ward. He starts taking them again.
He just wanders slowly around.
Mr never understands a word your saying { Mr nev for short} has been with us about 2 months is a pain. you have to go to his room to remind him to come down for that meal and he stands there and says " Do you think I should, is it really time. will you be there, not sure if I am hungry" { get the drift} man he drives you insane. but if he doesn't come down, you have to go back there and start the process all over again.
Mrs Z, very lovely lady, but very HUGE. our very large wrap around pad doesn't do up on her. We have to try and fit this on her every night and then get her undies on her aswell. She is nice though. Calls her wheelie walker, George of the Jungle.
Mrs I should be on oxygen is a weird/nice lady. Has a bitch for a daughter in law. Mrs I should be on oxygen has a severe heart problem caused by smoking, needs oxygen but hates wearing the mask or the nose pluggy thingies. She is 90. Her d.i.l will come in for a visit and demand her mil be put on oxygen. Mrs I should be on oxygen has to ask us for the oxygen when she needs it but she doesnt like it. But her dil reckons she knows whats best for her mil. The family cannot handle the fact that she is getting old. but now she has decided she doesn't need to have a shower either. I am so glad I am not her showere girl, there is going to be some fungus growing in certain places shortly if she doesn't shower, going by the smell of her today at lunch. Deorderant is pretty good stuff but it doesn't mask everything.

That is enough for now, this Senior Carer or pca as we still have to call ourselves is going to bed, it has been a very busy week of nursing ressies and paperwork but that is another story.
But before I go........ Have your bowels opened today.